The Book of Stallions, Chapter 1

1. Lo, did the Giant Pink Unicorn appear in a dream unto me, his blessed servant Brian Ragle. And he spoke and it was the sound of a terrible whinny of anguish and I quaked in my soul, for I was truly afraid.
2. The Giant Pink Unicorn did see my fear and touched me with his Blessed Singular Horn, and spoke again, saying “Be not afraid for this night I have welcomed you into my herd, yea a new foal.
3. And you will write my words, even those words I have written on your heart since you were a young colt. You will be my herd and I will be your stallion.”
4. I, the servant of the Giant Pink Unicorn, did still my trembling and wept with joy. For his love entered me and I glimpsed the blessed Pastures of his eternal rest even the Barns of Gold.
5. But he took that vision from me and said “Now is not the time for such things for I will reveal their glory unto my own time and glory”
6. And I saw a vast blackness and was afraid. From the darkness, the visage of his Blessed Singular Horn did appear. And lo, it was as the tearing of a curtain with a dagger for the Blessed Singular Horn did tear open the sky of dark.
7. Thus the Giant Pink Unicorn opened the universe with his horn and trotted, nay, even cantered into it in his glory.
8. The earth was foaled from the glory of the Giant Pink Unicorn, for he did approach the mare.
9. Lo, the mare stood by, for she was in the universe from before and awaited his arrival with the tearing of the veil with his Blessed Singular Horn.
10. And she had no horn, for she was a mare and smooth was her forehead.
11. The Giant Pink Unicorn smelled her from afar and it did incite him to tear through the veil of darkness, even the fence that separates fields.
12. And he did find her and come unto her, saying,
13. “Your are my beloved mare and you will bear my foal, yea, even my herd of foals. And they will spring from you by virtue of my glorious Pinkness and I will be their stallion and they will be my herd. Yea, and so it shall be.”
14. And the mare did whinny her response, for no words were hers to use for she was only a mare.
15. Yea, and the Giant Pink Unicorn did unto her even as he said he would do, and thrice more did he unto her all that he said. And still she could not speak for there was no breath left within her and no words for her use.
16. And the Giant Pink Unicorn, seeing that his beloved mare lay dead with exhaustion did touch her with his Blessed Singular Horn and lo, she arose as fresh once again.
17. And she did receive from him again, yea even two-score more than he had promised. And she was blessed and did conceive a foal.
18. The Giant Pink Unicorn stood by his beloved mare who could now speak, given as she was the blessing of his Pinkness to use words.
19. And she spoke and said unto the Giant Pink Unicorn,
20. “Surely thou art my stallion, for no other could use me even so long or as many times as you. Now, behold I carry your foal and her name shall be Earth, for that is the sound that didst pass from my lips when you first entered me as your beloved.”
21. And the Giant Pink Unicorn did weep to hear her words and he did nuzzle his beloved mare with his nose and whinnied his love into her ear.
22. Yea, the foal did grow and drop from her well used loins into the darkness.
23. The foal was blind, for it could not see in the dark and then did the Giant Pink Unicorn rear up,
24. And his hooves were terrible in their fierceness and they clashed together to spark greatly.
25. From their sparks there came a light into the darkness.
26. Lo, even that light that is the sun.
27. And the foal was a yearling.